Ditch Day

Bronson's last "first day of school" picture

When my caller I.D. shows that it's the High School, I know it's either a pre-recorded message about upcoming events, or about "your child was marked absent for period blah blah blah...". I've even occasionally had a personal call come in from a teacher or even school administration, but that's a different story and I'm not naming names. I got one of those pre-recorded calls today. One about my child being absent for two periods. Hhmmmm...... Bronson left for school today on time, and came home on time, but apparently was somewhere else other than class for a while in between. I decided to take it up with him later on in the evening. I texted him "Come into my bathroom, I'm washing my face and I want to talk to you." (I text these types of things because no one around here is a fan of my yelling voice). He appeared at my bathroom door. Me: "So you missed a couple of classes today?" B: "Yeah..." Me: "Well, what were you doing other than being in class?" B: "We went rock climbing." Me: "Oh....you do realize that you need to graduate..." B: "Yeah, but it's my Senior year...." Me: "You also realize that if you had asked me if you could ditch a couple of classes, I would have said yes..." B: a small smile and then "Yeah...."

It's been a very strange 2020 for school-aged children. I can't even comprehend the emotional toll it has taken. The schools and teachers have truly been amazing at adapting and extending so much help and grace to their charges. Watching last year's Seniors have drive-by graduation ceremonies was really rather heart-breaking. No proms, no games, no sports, no....no ditching classes. Life became one big ditch from the class-room. Parents became the supervisors of their children's on-line learning. Where once screen-time was a thing to monitor and limit, it became a thing to monitor and maximize.

Our local school district is back is session for 20-21 with a modified schedule. And mask-wearing. My child chooses to attend and comply with mask-wearing because "it's my Senior year" and the only thing weirder to him than wearing a mask would be to not be with his group of friends and teachers and have that last hurrah of secondary school. My daughter on the other hand, has taken their children out of school and is home-schooling. The idea of them wearing the required masks all day was more stressful to their little family than the daily stress of a typical home-schooling family. I'm grateful that both options are available to all families in our area.

Bronson is my last-born. He has had all the advantages and disadvantages of being the caboose of seven. We certainly made plenty of mistakes with all of our children. Probably too strict in some areas, too lax in others. When our oldest was a senior, cell phones were barely coming onto the scene. Flip-phones. Not mini hand-held computers. The only computer in our home was in the kitchen, with dial-up internet. There are fifteen years between Natalie and Bronson. From her Senior year to his, technology has exploded. It has demanded that we as parents tackle and adapt our parenting ideals and styles and re-evaluate our principles over and over and over again. With lightning speed. Like never before in history. Where I once could sit with all my little children on the couch with me on a Friday night and watch a much-anticipated Disney show, there are now endless avenues of streaming non-stop online entertainment.

Precious mama & son mornings spent in the garden

Nearly fifteen years ago, on school mornings I'd make a big breakfast of pancakes before sending six of our brood out the door. My three-year-old and I would eat a later and more leisurely breakfast. After cleaning up we'd maybe read a few books together and then eventually make our way out to the garden. We'd pick a bowlful of raspberries (the golden kind that he had picked because he liked the color) and sit on the yard swing and eat all of them just the two of us, and talk about interesting things. Things that are important to three-year-old boys. Fifteen years ago, and sometimes it feels like five. Sometimes it feels like fifty.

Fifteen years between the first-born and last born! Natalie's High School graduation

One of my fave pics of all time....B and Ellie. Babies together and little soul-mates!

When he came to my bathroom door to confess that he had ditched, I said, "Bronson, I haven't seen you very much lately! I miss you!" He came over to the bathroom counter and leaned against it next to me. He said, "I know mama, I miss you too. But...it's my Senior year..." and then we had a nice long visit. I know it is happening. The gradual pulling away from parents and becoming more independent. It's a good thing. It's the right thing. But it's also painful to a mama's heart. And at the same time there's no other way I'd want it to be. He's a good boy and he has good friends. I'm lucky that like his six siblings I'll be his friend too. Maybe I'll ask him to ditch class with me one of these days soon.