One Tradition....be Flexible

I've always told my children that our family has one certain long-standing tradition around the Holidays. "Be flexible". Because no matter how much we try and hold true to certain traditions, we forget the one thing that often gets in the way. Life.

This will be my first Thanksgiving without either my father and now my mother. My first Thanksgiving that my mother won't sit at the kitchen island doing the tasks I hate (peeling potatoes, and picking the meat off the turkey carcass (a piece for the leftovers zip-lock bag of turkey....a piece for her mouth...), and doing the thing I love the most; visiting with me. Mostly listening to me. If she was anything, she was an excellent listener. This year I will have to be flexible. I will have to make her pecan pie. I will have to pick the meat off the turkey. And I will have to be a big girl, and pretend to fulfill the role of "Matriarch" of this large crew of people that are my family.

Mama loved Thanksgiving and this time of year.

Last year, I had written about Thanksgiving. I'll re-write it here today, because little did I know then that I would need those same words more than ever. I had written them for ME.

I've spent most of the last two days in the kitchen cooking. For me, cooking and baking are almost therapeutic. A time for my hands to be busy with the familiar tasks of chopping, stirring, and kneading, while letting my my drift to other places and times.

Holidays as a child, traveling what seemed endless hours to visit family that we only visited with on an occasional long-distance (and expensive) phone call. Wondering why we had to eat dinner so early in the day; and why would my mother boil the turkey neck all day. Why did I eat everything but the pecans of her amazing pecan pie. Watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. The excitement of getting to stay up late and riding in the front seat between my Grandparents to go to the airport to pick up Auntie Juliana She was a TWA stewardess, and might have just flown in from Paris or London. Sitting next to her on the drive home, and thinking how glamorous she looked in her uniform and how she even smelled like exotic European perfumes. Sometimes she even had a piece of English or Swiss chocolate in her bag for me.

My Auntie Juliana on the far right. A TWA stewardess and just as beautiful on the inside as she is on the out! (She JUST retired from the airlines just a few weeks ago. I adore her!

My first first Thanksgiving meal that I had as a young married girl. My mother-in-law Pearl's famous corn-bread stuffing and cranberry Jell-o salad. My first attempt at making a pie. My daddy sitting at my kitchen counter and peeling so so many potatoes for me. Because I hate to peel potatoes, and because he would do anything for me. The smell of yeasty rolls baking in the oven. Boiling the turkey neck for delicious gravy. (Just because that's what you do). Lazy afternoon naps with full tummies and full hearts.

Pearl made the BEST cornbread stuffing and cranberry jello salad!

Daddy would inevitably end up with a baby or a cat on his chest napping after Thanksgiving dinner. Sometimes both.

Families change. We age. We add members. We experience loss. Sickness. Disagreements. Births. And death. But the one thing that never changes is the love. Strong and immovable. That is what I think of when I look at these mountains from our front porch.

Home and family is in our hearts. And tonight, this is what I am most grateful for. My people. Wherever they might be.

P.S. I eat the pecans now.

Pearl's Cranberry Jello (as I can best remember)

1 large box Raspberry Jello

1 can whole cranberry sauce

1 can crushed pineapple

1 C. chopped pecans

1 apple (shredded)

whipped cream

Make Jell-O per instructions on box. When almost set, but not quite set, (you know that stage of "set" where you can add stuff to Jell-O but it doesn't rip the "set" jell-O apart sort of "set". Then add all the other ingredients. Top with sweetened whip cream. That part is important because it looks like a hot mess, well really a cool mess because it should be chilled by this point, and the whipped cream will disguise the looks of it. But trust me. It is sssooooo good. And it isn't Thanksgiving unless you serve it.